I am trying to find that video of Coach Lyqa Maravilla where she pointed out that successful people take their time talking, but I can't find it. If you come across the video, please link it to me.
Anyway, the context of the video is that successful people take their sweet time to make a point — in speeches, in write-ups, in almost everything (think: VP Leni Robredo, Brene Brown, etc.) And she is right. I also realized that they are soft-spoken, articulate, and eloquent; it’s almost always that they get their point across the first time they introduce the idea they want to convey AND YET, they leave you wanting to listen or read more of what they have to say.
The idea puzzled me a lot. Admittedly, I try my best to articulate my thoughts through writing. But I do recognize that I need to work on my daily conversations. Even if I previously did podcast episodes, I know that I could improve more when it comes to talking slowly, thinking of the right words to say and communicating clearly what I have to say.
There you go… thinking of the right words to say.
More often than not, I know what I want to say, I just fumble flipping through the imaginary thesaurus that I have built in my brain in the course of learning over the years. I just cannot find the proper word to use at the exact moment, and I know that I am not the only one on this ship.
Sidenote: this is probably the reason why I am so fascinated by Taylor Swift. The woman is innately poetic and articulate in translating her thoughts into masterpieces.
“Never be so kind, you forget to be clever; never be so clever you forget to be kind.”
I have this theory that I am built like this because I was so used to being in fast-paced environments, leaving no room for idle moments. Everything I do should be fast and accurate. And if I wasn’t sharp, fast, and accurate, I could lose the attention I need to keep people listening to me. My jumbled words are hooks for people to give me a chance to clarify my thoughts. That is usually the case instead of taking my time to preface my thoughts, pique their interest, and lead them to an interesting big idea.
Time is really a key player in shaping the person we want to be.
Discarding the idea that we are always in a rush and running out of time does wonders for the nervous system. Once you recognize that time is your friend, it contributes to the regulations of your emotions. All these dominoes into clarity and eloquence like clockwork.
So breathe — mindfully. Take all the time that you need.
Now that I am in my early 30s, I am slowly learning that time is an expendable resource that should be valued the most. Anything that makes me feel rushed and pressured, I re-evaluate and discern. I ask myself if these things are temporary or would be the default in the long run. If it is the latter, then no matter how good the opportunity is, it is definitely not better than keeping my emotions regulated on the daily. My simple equation is this:
taking my time = being able to breathe = keeping my anxiety at bay
Success also means a lot different to me now. Having nice things still excites me, I am still realistic and practical. But having a surplus of them leaves me empty and wanting more. Striking the balance between having and wanting will always be a game I am willing to play until I’m old and gray: it makes my life thrilling.
What I consider wins nowadays are:
being able to wake up without an alarm every day
having the time to work out on weekdays
allotting time to cook and prepare my meals
marinating my thoughts on a strategy, sleeping on it, and deciding if it’s feasible after a day or two
making actual quality time with my loved ones
getting enough sleep
scheduling self-care activities such as massages and facial treatments
My life’s luxuries are heavily time-reliant. I acknowledge that my presence here on Earth is limited, but I am also happy knowing I had the chance to make the most out of it before it is too late.
Because I am allowed to take my time. Successful people do take their time.